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BRANT WATCH
An all-inclusive yet clearly, for legal purposes, satirical and made-up website for brant brothers sightings, news, gossip, rumors, photos, and other necessaries. *this satirical blog was written circa 2015. RIP Harry Brant, in all seriousness (1996-2021)
2nd Jun 2015 | 8 notes
“Dad’s inside, self-flagellating with a two-foot hunk of Etruscan salami,” Harry tittered, referring to Patriarch Peter I’s perennial bout of son-shame during the Brant Pondering, Consciousness-Raising, And Philanthropy Institute’s annual Totally Wasted ATV Rodeo. “It’s a pity, because this is for charity. And okay okay yah, boooring, there was that cousin who lost her legs, but they put them back on. Mostly. And if they hadn’t, she would have gotten those fucking sweet bionic ones, and probably run in the Olympics like some kind of goddamn cyborg champion.” Harry, rudely jerking the accelerator, proceeded to drive his qua
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